Painting Spiders
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If you’ve been following me for a while then you know that I like to paint stuff
As far as I’m concerned, just about everything is fair game for a good coat of paint
And over the years I’ve painted lots of things you’d expect to be painted
Like furniture
Mirror frames
See the post on this DIY Painted Mirror Frame HERE
And Accessories
And I’ve also painted a few unexpected things like leather boots (remember Zodiac boots??), metal railings, light fixtures, decorative tree branches
And books
See the post on Painting Books HERE
But the weirdest thing I’ve ever painted was a BLACK WIDOW SPIDER
Well, okay — Mr. Redoux actually painted it
But I was an unwitting accomplice…
We were building our house in Northern California
And we were painting the exterior
It was 95 degrees in the shade but of course, we weren’t in the shade — we were standing on that black roof in the heat of the day!
People driving by were getting quite a look at these two crazy people on the roof with our paint hoods and wet rags tied around our heads trying to keep cool
We looked like some kind of Paint Ninjas…
When we got to the area in the back of the house where the gable end is about two and a half stories high, Mr. Redoux was 25 feet up on the extension ladder and told me to hold on to the bottom of it and keep it steady
Like I was going to be able to hold that ladder and save him if it started to fall….
Well there he was up in the peak of the gable spraying paint on the siding when he calls down to me ‘Hey! I just painted a black widow and it’s kinda mad’
So I look up and here comes this huge widow, no longer black but now totally painted Benjamin Moore Sag Harbor Gray!
And he was right — she was a little upset…
You’ve heard the expression ‘madder than a wet hen’?
Well, I think they should change it to ‘madder than a painted spider’
And now this mad, painted spider is hanging by her thread from the paint hose and dangling right at my head
And every time Mr. Redoux pulls the trigger on the sprayer, the hose jerks which sends her bouncing right in front of my face
Her legs were splayed straight out and she kept twitching them at me with every jerk of that hose
All the while Mr. Redoux is calling down to me saying ‘whatever you do, don’t let go of the ladder!’
Now I’m here to tell you
That, despite looking straight at that nasty, Sag Harbor Gray, spitting-nails-mad creature dangling and bouncing right in my face…
I did not let go of that ladder
I held on tight
I stayed the course
And I kept that ladder steady…
So hey, I guess I really am a Paint Ninja!
But I did yell ‘HURRY UP!!’ ‘HURRY UP!!’ a lot…
Anyway, I don’t think she could’ve bitten me because I’m pretty sure her mouth was painted shut
GET THE LOOK
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